Is it Senseless to Dream and Plan?

13 Replies

To dream the impossible dream . . . or is it? A journey with Dementia

My Dad, who had visited oStand Up To Your Obstacles Pealever 200 countries, often said he regretted that he and my Mom never fulfilled their plans to tour the United States.  My husband, Roy, and I have shared that same dream for many years.  Although we have traveled to many states for various functions, we have never truly “seen” the states. Knowing that at some point my dementia will prohibit such a trip, we set a date and started to plan. 2018 for a four to five week trip exploring our wonderful country. AWESOME!

As we shared our dream with others, the reactions were mostly targeted on why I could NOT take this trip. People were quick to point out my confusion and lack of focus, as well as the expense. Some openly expected me to fail and expressed it as an unrealistic waste of time to try. My excitement started to wane, being replaced with a feeling of loss for a trip I would never take.

Dreams are the foundation of hopes and ideas. They are often the beginning of the challenges weundertake, and the stimulus for our accomplishments.  They are the drive that empowers us to keep moving forward. We dream of getting a new job or a new house, raising a family, being successful, and overcoming obstacles. “Hope is a waking dream” (quote by Aristotle).   Therefore, as you destroy my dream, you also destroy my hope.

“Is it unrealistic to dream and make plans, even though the odds may be against it?”

As I contemplated this, I became inspired by some of the well-known “greats” of the world who accomplished their dreams in spite of their disabilities. Helen Keller, though deaf and blind gained a bachelor’s degree, campaigned on, disability and women’s rights and became a well-respected speaker. Beethoven composed some of the most sublime pieces of music after he was deaf. Bethany Hamilton after loosing her arm in a vicious shark attack, got back on her surfboard and (in addition to many other championships) went on to win First place in the NSSA National Surfing Champion. There are thousands of people who reached for a dream in spite of the odds. Some made it and some did not, but they all battled tremendous obstacles to follow their dream.

When people try to protect me by saying and expecting that I am unable to do something, in essence they are crushing a piece of my spirit. Yes, I have many limitations. As so many others have, we are learning to deal with them. We are learning to make adjustments, working around challenges and obstacles, while still maintaining the ability to love and laugh. Michael Jordon said; “If you accept the expectations of others, especially negative ones, then you never change the outcome.”

Maybe I am setting my expectations too high, or maybe I just need to figure out how to overcome the obstacles. If you take away my hopes and my dreams, I am left with an empty life of watching my degenerative brain impairment slowly make changes to my life. No, I won’t let otheObstacles Don't Have To Stop You Michale Jordanrs squash my dreams! Instead, I will reach for the unreachable star and follow my dreams “no matter how hopeless, no matter how far” (Don Quixote).

Now having made that decision, I need to get started on some plans. Stay tuned for future posts on planning for 2018! Sure, there is a possibility that it may not happen, but think of all the fun we will have planning and dreaming!

Love & Laughter,  Laurie

Written By Laurie Scherrer June 2015

Here’s my Inspiration:  Gomer Pyle “To Dream The Impossibe Dream”

© Copyright June 2015 Laurie Scherrer

13 thoughts on “Is it Senseless to Dream and Plan?”

  1. Mike Good

    I love it – you’re article got me excited for you! I look forward to hearing how your plans lay out and I hope to hear about some of your near-term dreams and accomplishments as well. If I’m still in California in 2018 and it’s on your list, maybe our paths will cross : )

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply ↓
  2. Paulan Gordon

    I am so happy that you are doing this. You know I love to travel. Also, I think everyone needs a dementia break. You and Roy will be fine. I always take a journal with me when I travel. I try to make very specific entries so that later I can remember how much fun I had. Looking forward to hearing more about your travel plans.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply ↓
  5. Dwight

    So proud of you and Roy. I thank God for giving Roy to you. He has been a rock and an encouragement and challenge to others as you have been.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply ↓
  9. Eileen

    My husband who has had alz for 4 yrs and I were coming home from doing errands and were just talking about this. We are planning a week at a beach house with our children and grandchildren this summer. But we also want to take s trip by ourselves before this disease takes over our lives.
    I say go for it. You have nothing to lose and so much to gain. We have always come home after our trips much closer than when we left.
    Bless you and your care partner enjoy the time you have getting closer.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply ↓
  10. Mary A.

    What are your thoughts on music & media therapy for senior with Dementia. I’ve had some great success with music with my mother for the last few months and wanted to make sure other knew how much things can improve.

    I used this site to download some media sessions:
    http://www.relivmedia.com

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply ↓
    1. Laurie Scherrer Post author

      Mary A., Thank you for reading my blog and for your comment. YES! Music and art therapy have proven to be calming and uplifting for people living with dementia. I know many people who have developed a hidden talent for music or art after their diagnosis. Sounds like you are thinking outside the box with your Mom. There are many options rather than drugs.

      Like

      Reply ↓

Leave a reply to Laurie Scherrer Cancel reply